Will Smith feels that a “core trauma” that occurred when he was about 9 years old left him with a wound that he has worked to repair for the rest of his life.
In his new memoir “Will,” the “Men in Black” star describes the incident in detail. On Wednesday, he discussed it with Hoda Kotb on TODAY with Hoda & Jenna.
In his book, the 53-year-old Smith claims that his movie star persona is a fabrication meant to conceal “the coward,” a self-description derived from a horrific event in his early years.
“In that same chapter, I talk about the idea my father was abusive with my mother,” Smith stated. “I think I was nine years old when I witnessed my father abuse my mother. And I was too afraid to take any action. And it was engraved just on my impressionable mind.
What kind of child would stand by and watch someone beat their mother without taking any action, you know? And that turned out to be the fundamental trauma of my early years, around which my character and personality developed, to be the antithesis of that, you know. I would never experience fear again.
Smith greatly admired his father, Willard Carroll Smith Sr., who passed away from cancer in 2016, which made the event much more devastating.
“What was really difficult for me is my father’s my hero,” he stated. “That contradiction shatters a young mind, you know? My father is the best person I’ve ever known. How could you possibly love someone who did that?
“That really just became the central core of the wound that I was overcoming throughout my childhood, and then ultimately throughout my life.”
He informed Hoda that writing his book gave him the confidence to speak candidly about his early years.
“I want to make it OK to not be perfect,” he stated. “Just being yourself, feeling happy when you feel good, and feeling horrible when you feel bad is so much easier. Additionally, to enter a place where you are accepted for who you are and don’t need to change who you are to be respected.”
Smith also noticed some similarities between his father and the part he played in the upcoming movie “King Richard,” which opens in cinemas and will be available to stream on HBO Max on November 19.
He portrays tennis greats Venus and Serena Williams’ stern father, Richard Williams, who brought them up in a difficult Compton, California, area and helped them become breakthrough stars in a sport that has few Black athletes.
“There was a certain amount of brutality that Richard Williams and my father suffered that created a certain hardness and endurance,” Smith stated. “And then combining that in some way with my own parenting approach. Instead of making them into an ideal that I need to feel good about my parenting, it is my responsibility to feed and water them to become what they already are and to grow into what they are.”